I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
