I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
