Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
