if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
