i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
he thought i was a dude.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
