I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize