What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
