their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize