ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize