we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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