Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
