I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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