PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
