Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize