so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
