Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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