His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
