but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
