I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
