Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize