I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize