The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
