i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
