Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
