did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize