C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
