and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
