Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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