i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
