with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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