i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize