I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Randomize