Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
