Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
operation have a gay friend backfired
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize