farters have to be the big spoon...
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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