I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
and i looked up. we had an audience...
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
