found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
