I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
