The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
