he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize