we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
