now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
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