but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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