So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize