Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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