so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
we made out on top of his cat.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i came on her dog
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
