its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize