what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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