mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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