remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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