I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize